2K11 we're working on a mission...

 Hi everyone. Thank you for the continuous support. I've been slacking on the blogging, but I wanted to let everyone know that I am working hard to set up my business so I can do my art full-time and with the help of an angel sent to me from heaven: my girl friend Stephanie Pecho, we are working towards making DLG (DreamLoveGrow) a registered charitable organization so we can help children full-time too.

I've had enough of thinking about making my dreams come true, this year I'm going to give my heart and soul to making them come true, for me and for as many people and children that I can.

Not only is Stephanie helping, but I'm working with the Rhema Creatives, a group of dentists and doctors and musicians in Cebu, Philippines. With their help I am finding a way to give back to my country that I so graciously left at a young age. These amazing individuals already bring outreach programs to many, many communities and we're trying to help them achieve this together and on a slightly larger scale.

Our objectives and goals are geared towards bringing positivity and light to underprivileged children and communities with our creative and environmental outreach programs, as well as free dental and health care for the children and the elderly.

We have long-term objectives: an environmentally friendly CREATIVE LOVE MOBILE and a self-sustainable art center that provides a safe learning environment for children.

For more information, please visit our Group page:
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=7366056061

The truth is, I don't know how much good I can do in this world, but all I know is I have people in my life that are willing to help and support me and I am so grateful and so very truly blessed.
 

my grandma margaret

I've spent the past two days with my grandma after a year of being away. I've always been impressed by her never ending ability to create and her unsurpassed energy. At 90 her mind is as sharp as a whistle and she manages to keep her calendar marked full of social events that even I have trouble keeping up with. Her mental energy and her physical energy out weigh any person I know my age. The things that she keeps herself busy with, from knitting, quilting, baking, gardening, mixing concrete for stepping stones, painting and dancing, is impressive. I only hope to learn from her all of these skills that she's kept up with for so many years.

We had a long chat last night as she sat at the foot of my bed and just like school girls we talked about boys, love and stressful relationships. Within the past 3 months she has managed to acquire 1 younger boyfriend who can dance with her all night and then another also younger gentlemen who drives her around, mixes her beer and tomato juice and kisses her goodnight when they part ways. She grins at me when she talks about him and I can almost feel her heart beat a little faster. She tells me how the two men are best friends and she met the second one through the first one. When I ask her if the first one minds her dating his best friend after, she says, 'Oh no! I still go out dancing with the first one, but this new guy...(she has a twinkle in her eye) he's really just so kind." She stops a minute looks at me with another big grin and says, " But I can have my cake and eat it too!" She laughs and I laugh and I look at her in amazement. "I really lucked out," she said. And I think so too, but so did he. Anyone with my grandma for a girlfriend really has a woman that will keep them on their toes but will love the hell out of you. She asks me what I think of him and I tell her, "I really like him grandma, he's a keeper!" She smiles and hugs me.

Maybe I'm just a sucker for love, but listening to her talk inspires me to know that if I never find a "keeper" now, then at least at her age I can.

wrapping presents...

I'm in my basement putting together packages for the Shepperds of Good Hope. This is the third year that around Christmas I wrap gifts to bring to the shelter. A client of mine told me about it. I used to colour her hair and she told me one year of this. The Shepperds of Good Hope has this little gift-giving program. It's for people that can't always afford to purchase presents for their family. So the Shepperds of Good Hope asks people like you and I to donate what you can and wrap each item in clear wrapping paper so that people can come in and pick and choose the gifts that they want or the gifts that they will give. The past two years I've donated any leftover inventory from my art or clothing that I've created. This year I've been away in the Philippines and coming back I realized I have so many items I never missed while I was away. So I've been rummaging through everything and wrapping that which I do not need. I really don't need a lot.

So, while I'm not really one on forced gift-giving and commercial holidays, I do believe that this time of year is about giving and spending. Giving what you can whether it be love, hugs or kisses and spending time with loved ones, family and friends.

I should go back to wrapping the rest of those presents now. I'll most likely finish the rest in the morning. A friend of mine is kind enough to pick me up and take me to the shelter to donate the presents.

Happy holidays everyone. Love always and often.

A Cultural Experience

I'm going to reminisce today. I'm going to go back to the beginning of the year and tell you what it was like to be back in my country to live after leaving almost 20 years ago. Not only to live, but to work. In a very small area I was surrounded by both worlds, jumping head first into shock. I can tell you that I learned a lot. When I try to explain this, of course it's difficult. I guess the best way I can explain it is this.

Picture yourself, this scared but determined city person with a hippy side, that has flown across the world to go explore the jungle as soon as you get off the plane. You bring nothing with you but a group of strangers that you've never met before. In fact, you really didn't think these strangers were coming with you. You thought you were on this spiritual quest by yourself, but they decided they were all coming along for the ride. When you get off the plane, you walk into the jungle and you think you know where you're going. You soon realize you don't and neither do these strangers. So you're in the jungle and you're thinking firstly shelter, food and water. It is hard to find water in the jungle. This is what you're thinking but all these strangers around you are so loud that it's so hard to hear yourself. All they are doing is complaining. Some are drunk, some are extremely rude and some are just walking through that jungle with no care for anything else around them. After a while you want to kill these people but you don't want to be left alone in the jungle. So you put up with it.

As you keep walking you encounter a village. For some reason these people here know you. And only you. They tell you that you're part of the family and they have been waiting for so long for you to come home. You look around at all the adults and the children. Some expect you to hug them, some just stare and most of the kids come running towards you. You can understand them, but none of the strangers that are with you can, so they huddle together. You feel like you're at home in a strange environment surrounded by strangers even though you culturally don't fit in. It makes you feel good because they seem to love you despite not really knowing you. They also seem to love the strangers regardless of their behaviour and how they swear all the time. You're amazed that all they can do is point at things that are "weird" or "different" and wonder where the toilet is, or the shower, or the hot water, or the lavish homes. And you, you don't really care about any of these things because you feel comfortable and you just want to get to know this family. Eventually the strangers that you're with get bored. They eat everything, make a mess and complain about wanting to go on into the jungle.. so you bid your farewells and move along with them, promising your new family you'll be back. You have a connection with them that you just don't understand, but you feel good about it.

So not too long after that you arrive in this big clearing with the largest mansion type building you've ever seen. It's literally 5 minutes away from where you just were and you're wondering how strange it is to have this tall looming building in the middle of the jungle. You feel like it's out of place. So you go into it and it has everything you've ever wanted and everything you can dream of. The strangers with you are so happy and they run to everything because they are so excited. It has all the amazing foods from the western world you just left and all the technology and more. The people that live in this world are happy here spending all their money on expensive items, expensive foods, material items and drugs and alcohol. You think to yourself, ah, it's just the same here as it is in the West.

You watch everyone around you appalled, but it's hard not to get sucked in. So you live this lifestyle with them all the while a little part of you is still wondering about the jungle and world that is around you. You forget that you can speak the language. You forget that you came to this world to explore the jungle. You become exactly like the strangers. Eventually you become friends with them and form a close bond, but you're always wondering about the family out there in the jungle. You work every day for less than what you would make back in the Western world, but you convince yourself you're happy. You try to make up for it by traveling to other islands for a day or two doing seeing tourist attractions and feeling like that meant you really "saw" the place. You work and drink and work and buy. Eventually you become stressed out and you don't know what you want anymore. You contract this life threatening disease and as you're lying there not knowing if you'll survive or die, you begin to think about all the important things to you. What makes you happy. What your goals are in life. You remember those children and slowly as you regain your strength, you remember what you came here for.

You're at full strength now and you go back to work. But this time you're floating around the same friends and observing their lavish lifestyle instead of participating. You know you've had enough of it and decide to leave and go back into the jungle. You find your family and spend time with the children. You visit other villages that are the same. You visit orphanages and institutions for under-privileged children. You have this connection with children that is unexplainable because you know what it's like not to be loved as a child. So you want to just love them. You get to know them and you play with them and you realize what little they have that makes them happy. You see their faces when they are together and the love they bring each other. You look at the families and you see how supportive this community is of each other and their struggles. They are a team of survivors. They don't eat the western world food and they don't buy anything more than they can consume in one day. They have insane imaginations and they work very hard to provide for their families. At the end of the day they relax and talk with each other. They sing and dance and they fall asleep next to each other. They understand love.

You notice there are a few that go back and forth between the large mansion and their village. They do business with each other and you can see how it benefits the village. You watch as it helps to grow the community, but then you see also how they are getting exploited and taken advantage of. The balance between giving and taking is not level. The village gives more, when it has not as much to give. This makes you sad, but you accept that it is how the world works. The poor are always the ones to pay for the rich, but the rich are never happy.

You decide you need to continue on in the jungle. You learn about another community that lives with garbage and you decide to go find them. You take everything you can with you, everything you own and bring it to the landfill. You see the state of the families that live there and you walk over to each one and you give them something. You look at them in the eyes and you study their faces. All of them smile at you. They seem happy. You wonder if they knew another way, would they still be happy but they don't care about what other people have. They just know what they have to do. They don't go visit the other communities. They make a living this way, collecting paper, plastic and bottles. You learn they want the same thing as every one else: food, shelter, education and love. You realize they don't ask for anything from you, but you see how they have nothing. They are sick from all the garbage but they don't even ask you for help. All the children still play. They play as they work and they take care of each other. They smile at you and show you around their homes. It makes you cry. A lot. And you have no idea why. You have to go, but you promise you'll be back.

As you walk back through the jungle, you turn around and see all three communities beside each other. You see three very different worlds. You see the world that has everything, consumes everything, wants everything and more of everything and that has access to food, shelter, education and health care at any time. You see how they take it for granted. You see the world that lives modestly and humbly and can afford these things through strict discipline and a willingness to provide for each other and love each other. You see how they thank God for everything they have. You see the world that has nothing at all except each other, but you see their strength and their happiness. You realize both of those "lesser" worlds combined are in actuality, wealthier than the people that live in that large mansion. You realize all these worlds need to coexist in order to exist. You realize that you are a part of all these worlds and sadly, none of them will ever meet on the same level and the same understanding.

Your strangers that you came with... they came for the entertainment, the luxury, the experience of being somewhere new and having fun and getting the most out of this place as they can. You, you came for the people, the place and the life. The experience came with it, but you wanted a better understanding of yourself and the world. You got it now and you will never again feel the same towards anyone or anything. Neither worlds you came from will ever look the same to you. It is sad because you continue to feel alienated because you feel different every where you go, but at the same time you feel that you are more connected with everyone then ever before. You appreciate the fact that everywhere you go, everyone is doing the same thing but just in their own way... even deep in the jungle on the other side of the world.

The West met the East where the East was born, and the East will meet the West again, reborn.

YouTube

I admit I am addicted to YouTube... who isn't? But the reason why I love it so much is because it's every day people, like you and I, that get together to make something. Anything! We are in a world of entertainment and if you can't beat them, join them. Make your own art. Make your own videos.

Here are just a few of the channels I love and a few clips from them.

The Station:




My roommate the...




Mystery Guitar Man... I heart him.

paper cuts

It's not always important to think about love.
Sometimes the people you think would never crush you -
They do
Unknowingly they can take a dream and crush it.
Perhaps it was only meant to be a fantasy.
It can never be reality.
I can't take the pain.
We were never meant to be together.

Your views aren't my views
Your love isn't love
Not the kind I'm trying to grow
Your heart is a cage.
It's a cage.
You cut me like paper
Because you're never there.

I suppose it's the only way I can think
You run across my mind
The temptation I find is darkness
But you'll bury me with you
And I want to breathe.

Your views aren't my views
Your love isn't love
Not the kind I'm trying to grow
Your heart is a cage.
It's a cage.
You cut me like paper
Because you're never there.

I remove my mask now
These days I am who I am
I feel a discomfort
when you stare me in the face
I love you for you
But I hate you for you

It's just a dream
Better played out than lived out
I can't see the future
Where you're in it

Your views aren't my views
Your love isn't love
Not the kind I'm trying to grow
Your heart is a cage.
It's a cage.
You cut me like paper
Because you're never there.

waka waka

I need to learn how to become a better singer.

mailyne is not marilyn

I have completed my website portfolio after almost 3 days of endless hours plugging away information.

You can see the final product: www.mailyne.com

Now it's just about driving traffic there and getting Google to recognize that I am Mailyne, not Marilyn.

If you've made a visit, thank you and if you have yet to, please do and let me know what you think.

the beauty of where I was and the beauty of where I am now...

Coming back to Canada was a shock in many ways, both good and bad.
At first I was going to tell you about all the things I hated and all the things I miss about the Philippines, but I can't. The worlds are so different that there is just no comparison. There are too many things here that I equally love over there. There are many things that frustrate me here, that frustrate me over there. There are things that I can accomplish here that I can over there. There is no difference.

But why are we so consumed with the idea of consuming here in Canada and the western world in general? Why are we so comfortable with the idea of making money, getting that paycheck and then going home to watch Glee or drink ourselves stupid at the bar? Why is it that material objects are so appealing to us?  And then we spread it like a disease to parts of the world that don't even know what a map looks like. It makes me a bit uncomfortable to hear how much people buy whether for themselves or for their loved ones. As if buying it is the only way to show they love themselves or each other. I don't deny I buy things too. I can get caught up in the stream. My line of thinking goes a little like this: I'd like that camera so I can shoot videos with people. It's a really nice camera. I'd like that camera to take pictures of people and scenery so then I can blow it up big and put it on my wall.. or paint it. I'd like that printer so that I can print those pictures myself at any time I want without leaving the house. I'd like that apartment so that I can set up my studio so that I can take pictures, make video and print things whenever I want and not have to leave the house.

I'd like...

I realize money isn't everything, but it is a tool to achieve what I want. I like to be creative and unfortunately in this world it requires money to be creative. Unfortunately in this world what they market to me to be creative... wins. But it's not so bad when you understand it. You aren't in control. The media is. The T.V. is. The internet is. You are told what to buy, sell, eat, wear.. etc.
I understand all of this from taking small business and learning about advertising and marketing.

Well, the funny thing is.. I need all of that too. The simple truth, "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em."
So I am. I am in search of the perfect place and the perfect team that will allow me to create in all forms of art that I do now and yet, make a lot of money to achieve what I want.

It's like... taking my talent into the world of really rich people and taking the money that comes from them... and giving it to the poor. I have decided I am going to be a subtle, modern day Robin Hood.

The beauty of where I was showed me what I want to do. The beauty of where I am now showed me what I can do.

One step at a time.

A note from Chuck

So I came across this one day from another blog and I absolutely love it because it's so true. I have met the person that defines my definition of love... though it took me years to realize.

Pinoy Bailey's Recipe

Ok, so I don't know where I'm ever going to get Tanduay when I go back to Canada, but I'm frantically collecting memories for when I do go back. Here is a recipe for an amazing home-made Bailey's using the finest alcohols in the Philippines, the good 'ol Tanduay. Trust me, it's so delicious you won't remember a thing!

PINOY BAILEY'S

1 Bottle of Tanduay (250ml)
1 Bottle of water (500ml)
1 can condensed milk (168ml)
2 sachets of instant coffee (2 grams)

Add ice cubes, stir and ENJOY!

*Please mix to your own accord. Some people like it stronger and some people like it creamier. The best part about making this is the experimenting!

Messages in a bottle

When I was in Moalboal, I came across this little store tucked away on the side of the road. I probably would have missed it had I not noticed the trees lined with glass bottles. When I came closer I noticed every bottle had a message in it. I thought, wow, were these messages that had floated all the way across the ocean that people have just tied to these trees in Moalboal? No, they were put there by this lovely woman named Naomi. Her store was called Naomi's Bottle Museum, which was full of knick knacks, used books, these tiny hand-weaved, colourful baskets she called happiness baskets and these bottled messages which she would write out and place them inside. This little woman was so amazing and full of love. She brought out a giant bottle with a bunch of messages in them, shook it up and told us each to pick one.

Kyle's read:

You are continually changing as day passes. Your progress as a whole-being is a record of changes that bring you closer to the truth your spirit recognizes. Do not fear CHANGE. Trust that it brings the WISDOM you need. All is well...

 Mine read:

Persist and win! Try and try, and try again without fear - making your courageous spirit so inspiring. Your principle in life makes your days of your existence so worthwhile, so wonderful, so great. Yes... you are indeed great. All is well...

How beautiful. Sometimes Life brings you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it.

Noami's Bottle Museum
Pamagbama Beach, Moalboal, Cebu
Philippines 6032

a mighty heart of garbage

So this morning we went to the Mandaue Landfill for the third time since we've been in the Philippines. Ify came with us for the first time. We got picked up happily by Tata and his son Philip and nephew JB who decided to come along. All of us made our way to the landfill with our packages eager to make another appearance with gifts. Little did we know just what we had in store.



You know when you arrive at the landfill because you can't miss it by the smell. It is enough to have your head spinning, but this time around was shocking. I've never seen it so... full of garbage. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but as my friend put it, judging by our previous pictures the landfill appeared to be livable and decently civilized. This time the paths were covered, mounds of garbage surrounded us on all sides and the houses we were trying to visit were not visible at all. Tata climbed on top of his jeepney to see if the houses were on the other side still.. sure enough they were. The kids working at the landfill were eager to be our guides. So we followed them pile over pile, our shoes getting covered with tar and muck and off we went in search of the usual families. But alas, they were nowhere to be found. Some were either off working or gone to church. Well, that's nice.

We did manage to find a few families, so after we loaded up the children with presents we handed out the remaining home by home. I felt sad that we didn't have more. I stood next to one of the women as her newest born baby pooped and peed in her arms. I watched as the flies immediately swarmed her. Why didn't I bring more towels or diapers or something for the babies? There are so many kids here and my clothing wouldn't fit them... yet at least. I watched as a few kids ran around naked by the garbage. I thought, why do they live here? What would it be like to grow up in a landfill? How do they get treated? A few mothers try to send their kids to school with their fathers collecting garbage, but how much do they have to collect? How do they feed themselves? My heart grew heavy knowing just how much garbage we create, how much food we consume and how much we take for granted everyday. I don't hear a word of complaint from them and I hear endless bitching, moaning and groaning from people who have everything. What a strange world.

We waved good-bye to the mother and the children as we boarded our jeepney and left the landfill. It's an experience I told myself, but it's a heart-breaking one. They choose to live this way, I thought to myself, but it's crazy. I can barely stand an hour in the landfill and there are people who live every single day that way. It's insane. I know there are squatters everywhere and some have chosen much more nicer places to live. Don't they realize how bad it is for their health? What about the kids? How do they shower? We got them toothbrushes with no soap or water. Sigh. Does it even make a difference what we do? I wish I could have done more. I wish I could have given more. But when you see their faces, it is their way. They don't know any other way, and in their hearts they don't believe there is another way for them. It is their home. It is their work. It is their life. And I am no one to judge them or change their opinion.

I just fell in love with Haji Springer

So I'm on this new tip because of iJustine. He's Haji Springer - THE Indian rapper doing his thang... I like just about any kind of music, but I'm rooting for this Indian rapper to stay in the game and not just be a new fad. Well, even if this song is his biggest hit... I wouldn't mind. Sorry guys, if you don't like this song, but I can't help it. Maybe you should watch iJustine dancing in the Apple store.

Gift Giving Season

It's about that time. It's almost Christmas time and like most people, I generally think about giving presents. Why? Because we were conditioned to and that is part of our culture on both sides of the world. Thankfully my family understands the real meaning of Christmas and that is to be grateful that we have each other. When we were younger of course we did the presents thing and in a small way we still do, but what I love the most is knowing I can go home and be completely warm and comfortable with them.



This weekend is my second last weekend here in the Philippines. I almost made it all the way to Christmas to celebrate with my family here in the Philippines, but there will be another year and hopefully all of my sisters can be there with me. Having family is a blessing which some are not so fortunate to have. 


I have managed to package at least 24 gifts for the families at the landfill. Altogether we spent roughly 1000php or $20 and we are able to give at least 24 gifts. I think that's pretty special. Although it won't be Christmas day, I want it to seem like it. Kyle and I bought toothbrushes, toothpaste, toys and stickers and I wrapped those items together with all of our donated clothing, purses, shoes and hats. The pile is mighty big, and apparently we have a few more people donating. Our trip back to the landfill will be our third time. We plan on going this Sunday, November 21st, which just so happens to be Fiesta. My mom here celebrates fiesta in commemoration of our dad. His birthday was the 22nd. Well dad, despite not remembering you... this one is for you.


The beauty of giving to the families at the landfill is because no matter what it is, they are appreciative of it. I don't need all of these clothes. Most of them are clothes I brought over and never even wore the whole year I've been here. Most are items, we've already spent time with and know that giving it to the families in the landfill would generate more happiness for them than it would ever generate for us. And that is the point of it all... to generate a little happiness. It is a two way street because by giving, it brings us happiness. I believe that these strong people probably deserve these gifts more than anyone else I could think of.


This weekend I will also be visiting the Albert Schweitzer Orphanage in Cordova. A few people from my old work are going to do a concert there on the 4th of December and I am sad I won't be able to make it. So I decided I would have to be there in spirit. This Saturday I will be teaching a few of the young boys how to mix paint and we'll be decorating the puppet stand where the hosting will take place from. Yes, the host of the concert is a puppet. How ADORABLE! See? See why I'm sad I won't be witnessing this?


Anyway, with this I've put together 70 small gifts for the kids which include a box of crayons, a notebook, a sticker and a love note. These are children who don't have families and who only have each other. It's the least I could do, and I feel it's very little. In my mind I wish I could have done more for these kids and for the landfill during my time here. I really wanted to open a center here for children who can't afford to go school and teach them everything creative. I never did that... but now I understand more of what it needs.

My plan for the future is to go back to Canada and save enough money so that I can come back here and spend almost all of my time with children all over the country for at least 2-3 months. In their summertime (April-June) children have nothing to do, which would be good for the center to exist so that children could have a place to hang out and learn. But during the weekends, I could also visit other children and bring the art to them. Children like at the Children's Village. Children in my community, children who have been molested by their families, children at the orphanage, the landfill and on the streets. There are so many possibilities here to help. There is more of a need for it here. 


Someone once told me that God created me with these blessings because I would give back. I was blessed with these talents so that I could also share with others. I won't forget that. I have been blessed with the knowing both sides of the world. I have been blessed with the experience of having nothing and having everything. I know what it's like to be a child who is unloved and abused. Sharing love with children is important to me, and despite all of my other dreams I want to accomplish, I must never get too side-tracked. I do have a greater purpose. In me there is a wild child who I must invest my time and love into, because she is the one that gives back. 

So... Santa baby, will you help me save enough money to come back and bring creativity to the children?

words..

Words are like pictures in the sense that you can look at a picture and find many different meanings. When you write something or read something it may not have the same meaning for you as it would for someone else. The writer may also have meant something differently. When you write, you write with a tone in your head. It's your personal voice. When someone reads what you write, they read what their voice is reading. Do you understand? We can't take words so seriously, or too personally. They are after all just words and it is beautiful that just like a picture, words can mean so many different things to different people. It is how it becomes everyone's.

confessions of a psychopath

My time here is ending. In fact 13 days and counting. What if I never wanted to leave? All this time I went back and forth between staying here or going back. And now that it's almost time, I falter in my step. Is this what I'm supposed to be doing? And why is that always the question anyway. I could scrape out my insides right now for tearing up my mind. If someone were to take the images out of my mind during this moment, they would be scared. Yes, at times I really believe I am mental. Perhaps I am empty. Well, if I was empty, I would be more at peace. The honest fact is that I have many demons, as you must know if you read this completely pointless blog of mine. We all do. They say in order to battle your demons you must keep yourself busy. I must have a lot because I always want to be doing something. I am always doing something. I work when I should relax and when I relax I feel guilty. I want to go back and then I don't. I want to snowboard and then I want to kite surf. Who gave me these choices in the first place? There are always two sides. Yes, I know I am blessed. I am blessed because I have had experiences that gave me lessons that few are privileged to learn. I have gone to hell and back on my own accord and yes, I am blessed for being able to have that option. That choice. That feeling of knowing. But there are always two sides. What if I never knew what that was like? Sometimes knowing and having experiences can really screw your mind up. It distracts you from your purpose and you always are unsatisfied. Stupid miserable artist.

Tips for Boracay

Hello everyone! I've been getting some messages about advice for Boracay on my Facebook, so I thought I'd try to give a little info here. I just recently got back so my recollection of it is fresh in my mind. Be sure that I will be going back! Ok so here we go.

TRAVELING TO BORACAY:
Right now is low season so everything is much cheaper. High season is from March to June and the prices double. This is because it is considered summer in the Philippines so everyone is going out there.
When we were there it was fairly quiet, but still full of people from all over the world.

To get to Boracay you have to fly to Caticlan and then take a bangka boat. The best way is through Cebu Pacific because they have the cheapest deals. When you get to Boracay you will be greeted when you get off the plane and you will have option of having a guide go with you to the island. If you aren't familiar with the place it's not a bad idea to have them go with you. You can give them an idea of the place you'd like to stay at and your budget and they will show you the best places to stay.

FEES:
Environmental fee: 50PHP/person
Boat fee: 25PHP/person
Motorbike fee: 50PHP/person that will drive you to the bangka

When you arrive at Boracay
Motorbike fee: 100PHP to take you the hotels and resorts.

When you leave Boracay the same fees will apply.
There will also be an airport fee when you check in which is 20PHP/person



THE STATIONS

Once you get off the bangka you have a choice of going to what they call "stations"
Station 1 is the high-end resorts.
Station 2 is the medium to high-end resorts
Station 3 is still being developed and is more budget friendly.
Whereever you stay you can access the whole beach.
We stayed in Station 2 at Nigi Nigi Nu Noos which is like a bungalow style resort. It is not a hotel because they have about 15 rooms and each one is built from bamboo and native materials. It is beautiful and surrounded by lush gardens. Although it is only a step away from the beach and the bars, it is still very quiet and peaceful. You really can't hear much of the partying if you decide to call in an early night.
When you stay for a week at any of the hotels, you automatically get one night free. 

FOOD AND NIGHTLIFE
Nightlife is everywhere. Lots of places have good deals.
There is always buffet for dinner at most restaurants, bands play everywhere and the food is great because you have lots of choices. Happy hour is at almost every restaurant. Nigi Nigi's was from 5-7pm, but if you walk towards Station 3 you can find Happy Hour from 2-10pm and the drinks are cheaper. 


Cost:
Nigi Nigi had rooms from 1500PHP to 2500PHP. We stayed in Bucaw which was upstairs at it was 2000PHP a night. Beers are around 45-60PHP and the cocktails ranged from 155PHP-400PHP
Happy Hour meant you bought 1, but received 2.
If you walk towards Station 3 you can find the drinks during happy hour to start at 30PHP.

There are lots of bands that play during the evening. At One MGM they have buffet at night and have live music and fire spinners perform. Towards Station 1 you can find lots of DJ's, live bands and discos ready for you. If you want to eat all night long you can go to Jammers in Station 2. That's the best place to go after a night of drinking. 



ACTIVITIES:

We stayed for 4 days and 4 nights.
It was enough to do mountain biking, walking, swimming, snorkeling and island hopping.
You can take tours, ride zorbs, go diving and many more activities. There are 3 beaches. White Beach is the best and the most common. There is also another one (Bulobag) on the other side where there is kite surfing. It is only a 10 minute walk away. The other one is at the north tip of the island which is the smallest. We never actually went there though.

SHOPPING
There is lots of places to buy souvenirs. The main area is D'Mall if you want more selection and nicer choices. You can bargain here too, but your prices will be more expensive so be sure to look around at all the stores to get prices to compare. There are places on the beach too if you want to purchase from the beach vendors - they are better for bargaining and the prices are cheaper, but they are also more persistent. You can bargain with just about anyone.

My advice is to just go and see for yourself and get a map once you go. This place is wonderful and is a nice mix of both western and eastern world. We've been to many islands in the Philippines and have been living on Mactan Island, so we have a good perspective on the difference. I would also recommend traveling to other islands to get a feel of the real Philippines. Each island is unique and although I love Boracay, I equally love the other islands I've visited.

Hope that helps... safe travels! If you want any more advice, please feel free to e-mail me.

distance can bring us closer

I've always believed that distance can make the heart grow fonder in every kind of relationship. About a month ago after coming back from the Children's Village, I wrote to one of my friends who has been a part of my inspiration as an artist. Over the past few months I have been learning the guitar and sort of freestyling songs as I go... this time I wrote one to her in the same manner - straight from the heart and out of my mind. If she wanted to, I said, she could play with the words and come up with a song. Like most ideas, I figured it would just be that - an idea. But to my surprise, a week ago I received an e-mail from her. She had gotten together with a few friends and composed this wonderful song. When I heard it I loved it so much, I knew I wanted to make a video. So I asked Kyle to help me shoot this idea I had and together in Boracay we turned our vacation into a memory, a video, an inspiration and something created from long distance love. 

 




 

We stayed at Nigi Nigi Nu Noos in Station 2 at White Beach, Boracay. Part of the video was shot at the resort. The rest was shot at White Beach and Bulabog Beach in Boracay. If you would like any information regarding this resort or the island, please e-mail me. I would highly recommend this place for any vacationer and I most certainly will be returning.

 For more information on May-Jun, please visit: http://may-jun.com

Freya my mermaid friend

Shooting part 2 of our mermaid tests with one of my best girls I met in the Philippines.

Moalboal

This past weekend a few friends and I decided to go to Moalboal in the southern part of Cebu. We left Friday afternoon, rented motorbikes and GTA-styled our way through the city and into the country parts, the mountains and the darkness to get to the lovely little town of Moalboal. It took us 4 hours and I lugged 4 giant paint cans on the back of the bike the whole way there. It was exhausting, beautiful and worth it. 

We arrived close to 8pm, ate a nice little meal and wondered the little strip of bars, restaurants and beaches. We stayed at Pacitas Beach Resort, the nicest place at the end of the strip and one of the cheapest. 700PHP for a night, 25p for the beer fridges, 15p for coke and water. Amazing. The little mini homes led out into a grainy beach and down stone stairs directly into the where old coral made up the majority beneath the water.

 We didn't stay up too late as we had an early start the following day. Our main goal of the journey was to meet Aida. I had been trying to meet with her for a few months now, but sadly I kept missing her due to our schedules.

She started a day centre where children are fed and schooled who are underprivileged and malnourished. Our mission was to brighten up the kindergarten room and fill it with visual aids and other fun colourful paintings that the children could use as references. We had one of the teachers even come help us and another friend we met on our last adventure with Lets-Share.

We started around 8am on Saturday. Being the one that instigated this, I still had no clue as to what we should be painting. I had to wait to see the room. After circulating ideas in my head, I knew we would do the alphabet around the top of the room, as well as numbers and shapes and a fun mural. We thought that as a kid it was fun to measure how tall you werre, so we painted a ruler near the front door.

While we began the painting, not too far down the road at Basdiot Elementary School, Lets-Share and Aida along with a few very well-known people (including members of the Rotary Club in Cebu) had organized a dental care and eye care for the people in the school. Free. This on-going mission will be brought to many children through the Philippines in the coming months. We didn't get to see much of the event as we were busy painting, but we did catch up to Aida and Richard at lunch where we joined them in eating the lovely food made just for the volunteers.

Our painting took us to just about 3pm, where afterward we rewarded ourselves with a swim in the ocean, mango shakes, delicious sandwiches and for a few a nice, long sleep. The rest of them went out to the disco and stayed out til all hours of the night. Our plan for the next morning was to visit White Sands Beach, swim, hang out and then take the long motorbike home around noon. We did just that and while it poured rain on us a good portion of the bike ride, we were nevertheless happy and satisfied when we arrived safely in Lapu-Lapu.

Moalboal is a beautiful place. Many tourists visit for the diving, the scenery and the small-town vibe. For us it was a place to clear our minds, be creative, and appreciate everything we have in our lives.

White Sands Beach, Moalboal

My next series of art....

I am looking for something to paint, I said to myself today. I was checking out artwork from someone who inspires me - Positive Creations, he calls his work. He's so focused. His art is amazing. It brings the same vibes, the same style. Why can't I be that way? I thought to myself, well.. my artwork varies. I can't help but explore different ideas, different mediums. I am curious. I went through a whatever I want to paint stage in the beginning, to tropical sunset phase, to a buddhist phase, to a digital phase, back to a whatever I want to create phase... I have no direction with my art, and I don't mind. That's who I am.

"We are flowers of different colours" - Art

But with my art I like to create messages, provoke at least a feeling of love and transmute my inner demons so I can be a better person afterward. It's been a while since I've created. It's been a while since I've mused about a collection. The latest one is digital, with ART as my main character. He runs into all sorts of scenarios and comes out with a moral lesson. He is what reminds me to remember the lessons I've been taught. So there is he. 


But I thought to myself, what else? What haven't I explored. Simple. My culture. I am born in the Philippines, now living here and I have explored many parts of it and soaked up as much as it could visually offer me. So, why haven't I created it yet?
Well... I am now. My next series will be influenced by everything that influences the Philippines. Malay-Indo, Spanish, Chinese... 
Traditionally Filipino art involves weaving, wood, metalwork... a place I truly wished to visit was the 1000 Soil painting project of the Talaandig tribe. I missed it. However, I did get to see the wood art, where soil is melted and reshaped into beautiful jewelry.


As I googled "traditional filipino art" and searched through other filipino artists works, I notice.. there is nothing that particularly makes it filipino. The Fine Arts are everywhere. The same techniques and methods are taught, but we just express it differently. We express our experiences differently, just as we see them differently. 


So, I may say that my next series of art will be as close as I can get to the inspiration given to me by "traditional" art, but I have no idea where it will lead me or how it will look. Yet. 
I just need to close my eyes and think about the Philippines and become it as best as I can. 


It will be about the journey I took back into time, back into childhood, back into my roots where I came from and then coming out into the present.

model zone..

A new project I'm working on, with my girl Freya being the first. We may not be the stereotypical runway models, but we all face the highs and lows of the job. I want to find people that do it for the art, that respect themselves, their bodies and their morals.

the art of entertainment

I love cameras. You can capture just about any emotion through them and you can instill any emotion through their images. Within this past year my love for this medium has grown. Both photography and video are creative avenues that I recognize I want to explore for a long, long time. It's with all forms of creativity that I feel free. I have an opportunity to express myself by any means and by doing so I am completely limitless. I am lucky for this. I hope people know they too are limitless. There is a form of creativity in everyone screaming to come out. It's the perfect release and the perfect struggle, where the woes and joys of your day come out in one brush stroke, one click of the camera, one work of art. That is what I love about creativity. The fact that once it's completed, you can let it go. You never have to think about it again. And you can move forward.

ok go

Someone once said that when you try to battle your inner demons they get worse. That if you are trying to fight with your pain body, that it just holds on tighter. Today is an example of that day. The truth is I like it. I need these days. But then I think, will this just distance me more? Don't I look normal? Why is it then that I just don't want to be around many people that often? It's funny because whichever work I choose, I surround myself with people. I can be myself in that work environment and I never feel wrong being around everyone, socializing, delegating... But you take me out of that work situation and I can't enjoy it as much. I'm a little homebody. I go to work to be around people. I come home to be alone. I think of my dad. He doesn't have any friends except for his neighbours at the cottage, his family.. me. He's happy. I think the issue is still that at our age we try to fit in because that's what seems right. At my age, I don't think I'm like that. I need to be around fewer people so I don't have to feel a need to fit in because truthfully I don't care. It's all a show anyway. We're mostly ourselves when we're alone. Or maybe with that one special person. But even then... the time when you can most be yourself, free of any other thought, other voice, other influences, is when you're with you. Your demons and your thoughts and your feelings are the ones that know you best. They always said the path to enlightenment can be lonely. They said that sometimes you have to walk your own path to know yourself and be happy. It's a sacrifice many people are unwilling to take, which is why many people are truly unhappy. Then there is me. I find everything in myself that makes me unhappy and I sit there. I bath in it and I analyze everything that it is. I want to know where it comes from. I want to know how it feels and where in my body it touches. I know it's not permanent, but I want to know it anyway. Because when I'm happy, I'm really, really happy. The world and it's beauty touches me in ways that no human being can. I sang a song today... freestyled it with the guitar. One line in  it went "What makes me happiest isn't the same as what makes most. And I try to fit in to this society I'm living in but I won't and I'll be alone until I'm old."
I accept that feeling. It's real. No one knows how to feel anymore. No one wants to... they just bury it in other things that numb them. Don't feel bad for me when I'm sad. I'm doing all of it myself because I like it.

unresolved

So what is the matter then?
So screwed up in the mind.
I can't even explain.
I probably hate you and I fake to be kind.
Is that the case. Or is it so with a bottle of Tanduay.
You are angry you can't fit in and angry that you hurt within.
You want to be alone but you die for the company.
You sit on the fence and scream to be on both sides.
I think you suck.
That is all I have to say right now.
Because you don't know how to be you.

Camiguin

 The View from the Side of the Road

Camiguin Island

2010

 

A Bottle of Paper and Plastic

Enigmata TreeHouse

Mambajao, Camiguin Island

2010

 

The Sunken Cemetary

Camiguin Island

 2010

Fishermen

Camiguin Island

2010

Enigmata TreeHouse in Mumbajao, Camiguin Island

The walkway from the entrance of Enigmata

The inside of the main area

I have had the pleasure of experiencing a place like no other, but with hopes that there will be more like it. This humble ecolodge tucked away in the forest of Maubog, Balbog, Mumbajao, Camiguin Island has brought me inspiration and a sense of peace. And I soaked up those forests as much as I could. Ok, well technically it's not really a forest, but the entrance is so neatly hidden among the foliage of flowering vines, giant leaves and palms and green, luscious grass that it reminded me of the Secret Garden.

Enigmata is a center dedicated to sustainable living, creativity, and fostering knowledge and imagination in children. It was started by a few humble artists and musicians, whom I have yet to really have the honor of getting to know. But walking around the camp, you can almost sense their presence and hear their inner voices. I explored, excitedly, every nook and cranny, soaking up as much inspiration and imagining the thoughts of the creators as they created this place. Vines grew with wild abandon over the mixture of wood and bamboo, providing shade in almost every part of the camp. The walls were all different, intricate designs fashioned from bottles, wooden support beams of branches preserved in their natural state. Every bit constructed with love and adding to the atmosphere and homey feel the place had.

There were various rooms which we could sleep in, the eagles room, the bartenders room or the backpackers room. We stayed in the backpackers room, which meant we climbed up wooden stairs, fashioned out of imperfect planks of wood to our bed protected by a mosquito net. It really felt like the best TreeHouse I've ever been in. Art adorned the whole encampment, from the plants, the walls, the floors, to the paintings, to the necklaces, to the lights. Energy efficient lightbulbs were used and recycled plastic made up a few lamps, walls and even ceiling decorations. The bottles which were lined in the walls, made way for a colorful room when the sun shone through it. A murky looking pool gave shelter to about 5 turtles, all happily swimming around and poking their heads up to stare at us. There were cats and dogs roaming free, all well-fed, presumably off the mice that would visit us in the night and any leftovers the kitchen would have. You could smell the trees, hear the wind and feel the earth around you. If you needed a place to clear your mind and your heart, this place is it. There are no air conditioners and yet we were surprising cool, even as we slept. We would wake up to a cacophony of roosters, birds, cows, and other foreign animals as the sun broke through the loft in which we slept. We felt perfectly safe and comfortable.


But don't expect a full service resort. This is a little humble home to a few artists and musicians that try to live by the day. You won't always get what you want because they maybe will only go to the market once a day. If that. They waste nothing, but their foods are incredibly fresh and delicious. Our 3 days only gave us time to try for breakfast: the green omelette, made with tomatoes, onions, wild ferns and cheese, a pinoy medley of fried rice and eggs, and french toast and natural lemonade, and for dinner: a banana shake, a fresh, delicious veggie pizza, and 2 types of pasta, my favourite being the pasta basilica. For lunch we made it into town, stopping at a restaurant by the ocean.

The days were filled with visiting the Ardent hot springs, a small resort surrounding hot springs and pools. We were told many people come to heal, and I wouldn't doubt it as the warm water seemed to soothe my aches and cleansed my skin. The following day we made it around the whole entire island, making a stop at a cliff which over-looked the Bohol Sea, and the sunken cemetery where a giant cross sits in a bit of an intimidating manner about 50ft from shore and stood 30-40ft high. I felt a little strange thinking about swimming over peoples graves, but we snorkeled around and floated around the giant cross and thankfully there are no skeletons or grave stones. I guess they were all buried underneath the cross. We observed all the fishes which have made their home beside the cross. This place actually had the most fish I've seen in all the places I've snorkeled in the Philippines*.

The whole island is beautiful and in roughly 2 hours you can tour around it. Each area of holds its own romantic aura and leaves room for exploration. The island is surrounded by seven volcanoes, the most famous being Mt. Hibok-Hibok, which rises high in the center of the island and can be seen from miles away. There are tours which allows you to climb it, although you do need to be fit. Camiguin Island is wonderful and I never wanted to leave. Perhaps it was Enigmata, or perhaps it was the whole nature of the place, but it captures a large part you and leaves an imprint in your heart. I will be back there again and I am so thankful I had the opportunity to visit. It just so happened it was on Thanksgiving.

To visit the lodge or learn more, please check out their website:
http://camiguinecolodge.com/


*I suppose there haven't been many places I've snorkeled, but you can see the dead reefs and the over fishing done here is quite alarming and really turns me off from eating fish. 

Being silent

It's my second day of trying to be quiet and it's really hard not to speak.
I wonder if the little girl I met in Southern Leyte wants to speak all the time.
She's apparently a mute, but to me she's perfect.
When I first got off the bangka and met her on the beach, she just smiled and walked in the water next to me.
Her silence, even though it would be a "condition" was special.
It's special when you can be silent and still feel a presence... being able to communicate with no sound and still expel love. That's special.
Anyway, I realized that I try to speak more when I'm angry, but it's the best time for me to recognize my emotions. When you're angry most of the time you just want to speak it out loud and often in results in someone feeling hurt... or whatever. The damage is often on yourself because you don't recognize what it is that is making you angry. Just yesterday, my first day being silent, I learned that being angry is just an energy. And it can be laughed at, especially when you can feel the signs that your body sends you.
It was nice to know that my friends respected it. I met up with them in a cafe for lunch today, and everyone talked to me normally anyway... and laughed when I tried to reply in the form of charades.
I carry a pen and paper with me and when I bring it out, it's often the sign that I've failed in charades communication. It's funny though.. communication is often what we have problems with as humans, even when we can speak out loud. I wonder what I'll learn out of all this, and how long it will continue for, but I'm really enjoying it. It's fun and really interesting. I think maybe in the end it will just teach me how to listen more... to myself and others. A lot of people really don't have anything important to say... they just like to fill in the silence. I think when I do speak, it will have to worth talking about.

Tomorrow I will be going to Camiguin. It's a little island just north of Mindanao. The place where I'll be staying at is a little resort called Enigmata, which is dedicated to art and sustainable living. They hold workshops for kids on the weekend and I spoke to the artists and the owner. They told me I could do art with the kids. The best part about being with children and doing art, is no one has to say anything.

This is the type of place where I can be in silence and be at peace... I'll have to tell you how it goes.

If you want to see where I'll be, check out their website:
Enigmata TreeHouse Eco lodge

Childrens Village in Southern Leyte

This past weekend we spent with the kids from the Childrens Village and my heart hurts. They taught me so much in so little time, just about life and love.

We left Mactan on Friday around 10a.m. with Lets Share TV  on an adventure I will never forget. I boarded the boat with 2 Americans, 1 lady from Holland, a young male missionary from Spain, a half malaysian-filipino and a Belgium music producer. Eric, part owner of Lets Share had sent out a message to anyone who wanted to join the trip to Leyte and I was lucky enough to receive it. His mission is to help others, help others and by building a network of people, it will help charitable organizations be known and receive assistance from others. Sounds like my exact type of work.

The boat was set to sail for Southern Leyte, where we would be docking at a little fishing village near Padre Burgos. It took about 4 hours on the bright yellow Lets Share bangka and we were all happy to leave the mugginess of Mactan and have the wind flying through our hair and the taste of the sea in our mouths. The air of the ocean felt amazing as we headed into the vastness of the ocean.

We arrived on the most peaceful fishing village, where palm trees just lined the entire beach strip and all you could see was a tiny wisp of smoke from a near by campfire. Well... in the Philippines it's just a pile of burning garbage, but anyway. Tired from the journey and the excitement from the night before, I ate and went straight to bed to prepare for the next morning. 16 children from the village would be arriving at 10a.m. to join us on the Lets Share bangka for a day of swimming at Limasawa Island. Limasawa actually translates to Five Wives, though I am not sure exactly why.

The next morning we woke up feeling refreshed and as we sat finishing our breakfast, the children showed up at the entrance of the resort. The little faces stared at us in wonder and their little heads bobbed up and down with their bright eyes scanning each and every one of us. They were all wearing yellow Lets Share t-shirts given to them from the last visit and they held on to each others hands waiting for the next adventure. There was one House Mother, Brinda and a House Father, Angel that joined us on the 20 minute bangka trip to Limasawa.

The weather hadn't looked promising but as soon as we reached the island, the sun came out and smiled upon us. Perfect timing! The kids wasted no time and the ones who could swim jumped straight into the warm, green water. We gave out snorkels and masks and used the boat as a jungle gym, laughing and playing in the water. I ended up teaching one little girl how to swim and giving her encouragement. she kicked around happily and managed to give me a swollen eye with her left foot by accident, but it was worth it. We swam for 3 hours only to pause for lunch which was brought out on to the boat.

They were so eager to get back in the water, trying to pull me back in but I was eager to bring out my paint. So I did. I only had 4 paintbrushes, so myself and the others had to finger paint, which actually worked out alright and there were no complaints. Oh how talented these little ones were. They were so full of excitement and happiness, dipping their little fingers into the colours and mixing all of them together. I taught them primary and secondary colours and they happily created flowers, boats, blobs and whatever their little minds could think of. I asked them all to sign their name and show the camera their artwork. Even the house mother and the girlfriend of Eric, painted. And when we were finished, they all helped clean up and place their paintings in a neat row so they could dry. They even took the brushes and rinsed off all the paint and wiped up spilt paint with their wet bathing suits since they would be jumping back into the ocean anyway. How cute!

The day ended sooner than we wanted, but they didn't complain as they changed back into dry clothing and watched the ocean as the boat took them back to their island. We were all exhausted but happy. It was time to go, but we waved good-bye and promised them we would be back with them tomorrow.

Kyle and I ended the day laying out on the beach watching the night fishermen, listening to the ocean and staring up at all the foreign constellations. We saw a few shooting stars and the sky was full of the Milky Way. We lay there long enough to watch the stars move across their dark blanket. I found one constellation which stretched across the whole sky.
Anytime I look at the stars I am always reminded of last summer when I watched the sun set over the Grand Canyon and became enveloped in the darkness. I will never know darkness like I did that night and I wonder if that is how it felt right before the Big Bang happened.

we fell soundly asleep in our beds as there was a brand new day ahead of us tomorrow. We would be visiting the beach where the kids often played and then make a trip to their homes.

At noon the next day we got picked up by Jeurgen Schneidt. He is the founder and the president of KinderHilfe Philippines, Childrens Village and is basically a saint. He has devoted over 25 years of his time to helping hundreds of children receive love, care, shelter, education and medical attention. With very little sponsorship and donations, he has still managed to create a village with 10 homes that could house 14-16 children, all with House Mothers there 24/7. His wife left him to return back to Germany and so he does this all on his own, with his own pension. His main 3 projects are the Childrens Village, the medical attention where he has managed to actually receive help from doctors in Cebu who operate on his children for FREE! His other project is to build hospitals, schools and day care centres here in Leyte, of course funded entirely on his own.

After spending the day playing games with the children at their beach (which is really nothing but rocks and coral - the best part is the trees and the land) we got the chance to visit their homes, and is it ever beautiful. The love, and the care the children get really is incredible and the homes are really very beautiful. If I had been placed in a foster home, I would have loved this one. I spoke to the House Father the previous day and he had told me that the children do have families, however they are temporarily placed in this institution after they have been assessed. If the child's family can not provide for the child financially, physically or spiritually, they are brought to the village until they are graduated high school. Around that time they are released back to their families. However many come back in the summer to help the village or receive sponsorship for college. If they have no place to return to, then of course they can stay in the village.

The people who work here are amazing. They work non-stop 24/7. I got the chance to meet the newest member of the village, a one month year old baby boy. One little girl brought me into the house to meet him and I spent time with one of the House Mothers, where she told me life is hard and it's a lot of work, but she says it is definitely worth it. Jeurgen says it's quite difficult sometimes though because on several occasions he has had to let staff and house mothers go because they were caught stealing donation money. Jeurgen said the money is hard to come by, but when you see the wall of achievements, it's incredible that he could do so much just out of his own pocket. He has sacrificed so much for these little kids, but he is so happy to do it. It's amazing.

And when you see the kids... the moment we stepped out of the car they came running and smiling and laughing. They waited patiently as Jeurgen showed us around and once we were done with the adults, the kids from the previous day pulled us into the grass and jumped on us begging us to play. So we did. They were so curious, asking us what our favourite songs were, our favourite games.. anything they could think of. We jumped around, spun around, danced, sang.. I taught them 'I feel Good' by James Brown and they told me stories, how long they have been there, what they do, who visited them... and how very few people come to see them. Some days they feel trapped, but most days they are so happy knowing they are being cared for and that they are loved and they can look forward to the day when Eric brings people to visit and play with them. At 7pm the kids get ready to go to bed as they have school very early the next day... so sadly, we had to say good-bye. They asked, when are we coming back? And I had to be honest and say, I don't know... but I will not forget you. I gave whatever I had on me to the girls. My sandals, my hair elastic... my love. They told me they would miss me. They would miss us... and a few held our hands and cried as we walked to the car. Oh, how my heart hurt. I can see the sadness in their eyes and on their face... how much they want to leave with us, but they can't.

I wondered if they felt anything like I did when I was a kid. If they feel abandoned and if they truly understand what their parents are trying to do for them. I hope when they are older they can, but the best part about the Childrens Village, is really just the amount of love and support they have from each other. In a community where everyone is experiencing the same thing, it's so wonderful they can be together to help each other through it.

I'll be going back again, for sure. This time with more remembrances for everyone. The kids call items you give them remembrances. Jeurgen is also getting old and he fights the corruption here in the Philippines, but one day, he says, he knows he will be gone and what will happen then? None of the money will go to really helping the children.. but anyway he says, until that day he will continue on strongly supporting these children on his own.

If you ever want to go see him and his kids, they would love it. They will open your heart, break it in half and glue it back together stronger. That's what those kids do... If you want to support, please make a donation. He is someone I admire, and who I will try to support as much as possible. You can contact him on his website:
You may also contact me or Eric from Lets Share TV if there is anything you would like to do to help.

Kinderhilfe Philippens, Childrens Village
Padre Burgos, Southern Leyte
http://kinderhilfe.zdf.de

I support your wildness. Your spirit is out of this world.
I see it flying around overhead,  like a rockstar.
Your face is on billboards and I know you're living the dream.
I see your pocket full of cash and the way you seduce your riches, like they are your sex slave.
Your dirty little hands washed clean of desire, as you generously give. You give what you
could never have; happiness.
I see your strength growing. I believe in you, as you explore your depths and your soul.
It will come to you because you're in pursuit of it, like a stealth.
You can be like the shark, who is endangered and beautifully fierce and powerful that everyone
wants you, and everyone fears you for no reason. I will still love you no matter how ruined you are.
Because I have faith you will rise up, time and time again.
No one can cage your soul.

Kyle

Mon coeur est malade. 
Je pense que c'est juste pour le jours... ou juste pour le momente. 

Dear Universe

I am seeking an honest agent who can help me to market my talents and my skills.
I am also seeking a business mentor who can help me grow my business and guide me to success. 
Will trade my time.
Please help me.

Thank you kindly.
With love,
mai

You are beautiful.

farewell

Can you rise above it?
All signs point to stress.
The road ahead looks grim.
Your heart is unhappy.
Your mind has worn thin.
It's time, it's time, it's time.
Let's make a new road.
I wouldn't want to keep walking down this one.
Good-bye.
It was fun while it lasted.
And like a really unhealthy, teenage love affair...
I am breaking up with the dream here.
I am moving on to bigger and better things.
But regardless anyway, I know I will be happy.
And when I look back, it will still be good memories.
Because I can forgive.. but I will never forget. 

i love my tablet

Soul Searcher

Limitless

Shut up. No.

Maximum Balloon Groove Me Contest entry

FOR MY GIRLFRIENDS:

Danger

Super