Dear Mommy

I am sorry that we can not be together like you all want us to be.
It breaks my heart to see you cry. It breaks my heart to see everyone cry.
In the past couple of days I have seen more tears fall than I could have expected.
And so that is how it is. The lost souls. 
All trying to find  happiness. 
Dearest mommy, I just wanted to come home to see everyone smile.
I wanted to know just who I was and where I came.
And I see struggles. Everyone battling their inner selves.
Everyone battling each other. 
Where are we when we need each other? When will we stop running?
I am torn in between the beauty of this world.. and the ugliness that it tries to hide.
All at the same time. There is no paradise. It is all an illusion, mother.
It is all just bullshit lies. But I don't care. 
I will be blissfully ignorant until I break.
Until I cave into my insides and break down. And cry along with the rest of  you.
So that our tears make oceans together. And even if we are drowning...
At least it will be as one.