My next series of art....

I am looking for something to paint, I said to myself today. I was checking out artwork from someone who inspires me - Positive Creations, he calls his work. He's so focused. His art is amazing. It brings the same vibes, the same style. Why can't I be that way? I thought to myself, well.. my artwork varies. I can't help but explore different ideas, different mediums. I am curious. I went through a whatever I want to paint stage in the beginning, to tropical sunset phase, to a buddhist phase, to a digital phase, back to a whatever I want to create phase... I have no direction with my art, and I don't mind. That's who I am.

"We are flowers of different colours" - Art

But with my art I like to create messages, provoke at least a feeling of love and transmute my inner demons so I can be a better person afterward. It's been a while since I've created. It's been a while since I've mused about a collection. The latest one is digital, with ART as my main character. He runs into all sorts of scenarios and comes out with a moral lesson. He is what reminds me to remember the lessons I've been taught. So there is he. 


But I thought to myself, what else? What haven't I explored. Simple. My culture. I am born in the Philippines, now living here and I have explored many parts of it and soaked up as much as it could visually offer me. So, why haven't I created it yet?
Well... I am now. My next series will be influenced by everything that influences the Philippines. Malay-Indo, Spanish, Chinese... 
Traditionally Filipino art involves weaving, wood, metalwork... a place I truly wished to visit was the 1000 Soil painting project of the Talaandig tribe. I missed it. However, I did get to see the wood art, where soil is melted and reshaped into beautiful jewelry.


As I googled "traditional filipino art" and searched through other filipino artists works, I notice.. there is nothing that particularly makes it filipino. The Fine Arts are everywhere. The same techniques and methods are taught, but we just express it differently. We express our experiences differently, just as we see them differently. 


So, I may say that my next series of art will be as close as I can get to the inspiration given to me by "traditional" art, but I have no idea where it will lead me or how it will look. Yet. 
I just need to close my eyes and think about the Philippines and become it as best as I can. 


It will be about the journey I took back into time, back into childhood, back into my roots where I came from and then coming out into the present.

model zone..

A new project I'm working on, with my girl Freya being the first. We may not be the stereotypical runway models, but we all face the highs and lows of the job. I want to find people that do it for the art, that respect themselves, their bodies and their morals.

the art of entertainment

I love cameras. You can capture just about any emotion through them and you can instill any emotion through their images. Within this past year my love for this medium has grown. Both photography and video are creative avenues that I recognize I want to explore for a long, long time. It's with all forms of creativity that I feel free. I have an opportunity to express myself by any means and by doing so I am completely limitless. I am lucky for this. I hope people know they too are limitless. There is a form of creativity in everyone screaming to come out. It's the perfect release and the perfect struggle, where the woes and joys of your day come out in one brush stroke, one click of the camera, one work of art. That is what I love about creativity. The fact that once it's completed, you can let it go. You never have to think about it again. And you can move forward.

ok go

Someone once said that when you try to battle your inner demons they get worse. That if you are trying to fight with your pain body, that it just holds on tighter. Today is an example of that day. The truth is I like it. I need these days. But then I think, will this just distance me more? Don't I look normal? Why is it then that I just don't want to be around many people that often? It's funny because whichever work I choose, I surround myself with people. I can be myself in that work environment and I never feel wrong being around everyone, socializing, delegating... But you take me out of that work situation and I can't enjoy it as much. I'm a little homebody. I go to work to be around people. I come home to be alone. I think of my dad. He doesn't have any friends except for his neighbours at the cottage, his family.. me. He's happy. I think the issue is still that at our age we try to fit in because that's what seems right. At my age, I don't think I'm like that. I need to be around fewer people so I don't have to feel a need to fit in because truthfully I don't care. It's all a show anyway. We're mostly ourselves when we're alone. Or maybe with that one special person. But even then... the time when you can most be yourself, free of any other thought, other voice, other influences, is when you're with you. Your demons and your thoughts and your feelings are the ones that know you best. They always said the path to enlightenment can be lonely. They said that sometimes you have to walk your own path to know yourself and be happy. It's a sacrifice many people are unwilling to take, which is why many people are truly unhappy. Then there is me. I find everything in myself that makes me unhappy and I sit there. I bath in it and I analyze everything that it is. I want to know where it comes from. I want to know how it feels and where in my body it touches. I know it's not permanent, but I want to know it anyway. Because when I'm happy, I'm really, really happy. The world and it's beauty touches me in ways that no human being can. I sang a song today... freestyled it with the guitar. One line in  it went "What makes me happiest isn't the same as what makes most. And I try to fit in to this society I'm living in but I won't and I'll be alone until I'm old."
I accept that feeling. It's real. No one knows how to feel anymore. No one wants to... they just bury it in other things that numb them. Don't feel bad for me when I'm sad. I'm doing all of it myself because I like it.

unresolved

So what is the matter then?
So screwed up in the mind.
I can't even explain.
I probably hate you and I fake to be kind.
Is that the case. Or is it so with a bottle of Tanduay.
You are angry you can't fit in and angry that you hurt within.
You want to be alone but you die for the company.
You sit on the fence and scream to be on both sides.
I think you suck.
That is all I have to say right now.
Because you don't know how to be you.